My head, neck and chest were locked in a rigid metal and plastic frame. My head was positioned by screws that were twisted through my scalp, into each side of my skull. The halo was just icing on the paralysis cake. I already couldn’t move my legs and core, now my head and shoulders were locked into place as well. If things couldn’t get any worse, I found out that both sides of my head were shaved to accommodate the metal screws going into both sides of my temple. This was the Rhianna look that went horribly wrong. At that time discovering that both sides of my head where shaved, definitely was a bigger blow to me then having a rigid metal and plastic apparatus on 50% of my body.
My hair was extremely important to me. It was almost something I hid behind and served as a proponent to my self-esteem. My long brown hair made me feel like a chameleon, and allowed me to change my look at any time, better than any designer outfit would do. Flat ironed, curled, tousled, in a bun, in a high ponytail, any way it was done changed my look every time, and people noticed. This seemed important to me.
By the way, the halo what just wonderful to sleep in. A continuous cocktail of morphine, Percocet and Ativan made the halo feel like silk pajamas. Staying in a dreamlike and pain-free state artificially and temporarily made me feel that life was just great….